The Wonder of Motherhood

June 15, 2010 by  
Filed under Guest Space

Welcome to Stephanie Crawford as she joins us as our guest this week. More about Stephanie below.

Smooches Free by Pink Sherbert PhotographyAs a mother I wonder and constantly worry about the world my children live in and are growing up in. Before deciding to start a family I can’t recall my thoughts drifting to wonder or concern for the type of world we would be bringing our children into. I didn’t focus my thoughts on the wonder of what the world and their lives would be like in the future. I was simply focused on the here, the now and the excitement and anticipation of becoming a mum. I now contemplate had I wondered more about the future would I have made the same decisions.

The concerns which absorb my mind these days did not enter my mind, all those years ago. My main focus was on whether or not we could fall pregnant, followed by months of concern and hope for a healthy baby. Each day for nine months I wondered about the sex of the baby I was carrying. I gave no thought to the wonder of the many questions and issues I now face as a mother. I was 30 years old and at the time felt I was getting ‘old’. Now was the time to start a family for fear of not wanting to be an ‘older’ mum. At that time nothing else mattered, nothing else concerned me.

These days my mind floats questions I cannot answer. Will my children grow up to be healthy and well adjusted individuals, will they attend a public or private school, will they go to university, will we develop a close family bond, at what age will they potentially be exposed to alcohol and God forbid drugs? Was I naive to not give these questions and issues any thought? They did not even enter my radar as a 30 year old mum to be. Instead my thoughts were directed towards the excitement and joy of becoming a parent and the new direction and journey I was embarking upon. I desperately wanted to become a mum and really that was all that mattered to me.

Almost eight years later I probably spend too much time wondering about the future of the world in which we live, worrying and concerned about society today and its values. As someone who thrives on keeping abreast of news and current affairs I find myself frequently reflecting about life today and our world. I ponder the direction and consequence of world events, our future and the future for my children. So much of what occurs in our world, so much of what I read and hear discussed and debated shocks me, saddens me and simply leaves me wondering about human beings as a respected race. Much of the daily news causes me a great deal of distress. I find myself often wondering how the criminal mind operates and what motivates a minority of people to commit the most distressing incidents of crime. I wonder about how those affected by the death of a close relative or friend rebuild their lives following the incident that for one day made headline news.

There will always be a part of me that takes the time to wonder about particular news items and events. A part of me needs to know the why, the outcome, the answer or solution. I do wonder about the effects and impact of climate change, what does it all really mean? I wonder and would like to understand more about the causes and potential solutions to extreme poverty in third world countries.

With troubling news and seemingly endless issues facing our world I find myself striving to nurture my children to ensure they are adequately prepared for their future. I hope the experiences and learning they are provided equips them well to tackle the challenges and ride the storms they will face in life. What will their future world be like I often wonder? Will I always wonder about the ‘quality’ of parent I have been to them? Will I always wonder about the choices I have made that may or may not have impacted upon them? Will my wonder ever turn to regret?

Frequently I wonder about their childhood. Will they carry happy memories into their adult life? I wonder whether they will remember the family traditions we shared, the afternoons they spent playing cricket and kicking the football in their backyard with their dad, the Easter egg hunts on Good Friday, the days spent visiting country farms and the lazy days spent at home.

My mind becomes cluttered when I wonder about the influences my children will face in the world as they continue to grow and become adults themselves. I simply cannot understand so many of the events which occur in our modern world today. My journey as a parent will always leave me wondering, have I been the best mum possible. Have I been a good role model? For now I’ll spend my time wondering about the unknown, the wonder of where life will take my children. While I spend my time guiding and supporting them I pray their experiences are kind. I will forever wonder about the men they will become.

Photo source: Smooches by Pink Sherbert Photography

ABOUT OUR GUEST WRITER

Stephanie CrawfordStephanie Crawford is a born and bred Melbourne girl, enjoying life in her thirties. She is a mum to two gorgeous boys.

She is back at University studying part time through Open Universities Australia.  She is focused on completing a second degree, a Bachelor of Communication (Journalism). Stephanie is finding there is plenty to learn about distance education and online learning.

She is excited to be pursuing her lifelong dream.  Her motivation and goal are a career as a freelance writer. She loves to share her opinions and has a passion for writing. She is actively seeking writing opportunities to further develop and strengthen her skills. She wishes she had more time to experiment in the kitchen and more time to harvest her own vegetable garden.

Comments

4 Responses to “The Wonder of Motherhood”
  1. Rene says:

    Being a mother as well I certainly have had those thoughts, but now we do not have the 6 o’clock news on as there are no real good stories anymore. I am probably sheltering my boys from the world around us, but at the age of 4 and 2 I think there is a time and a place to show them and teach them about those things.

    I have not really given up on wondering, but I think more along the lines of “whatever will be, will be” as you cannot control everything around them but be there to support them when it is needed. Let them make their mistakes and be there to pick up the pieces anyway you can and for them to know that you are there at any stage in their lives to talk about things. You can only really deal with the here and now, and try to steer them in the right direction before the *&^% hits the fan.

  2. Stephanie Crawford says:

    Hello Rene,

    We also do not have the news or current affairs programs on while the children are up. I still believe at 7 and 5 years of age they are too young to see the ‘real world’. They may be sheltered but in my mind they are still young and have a lifetime ahead of them. I want them to experience and live their childhoods. I want them to be children.

    You are spot on, we definitely can not control everything around them. Once they start attending school, they are not by our side for us to watch over. The quickly learn independence and begin to explore life and their world.

    Yes we can support them, steer them in the right direction and be there for them.

    The ‘wondering’ about their future fascinates me. What path will their life take? How will it unfold? It’s like I’m reading a book, I can’t wait to get to the next chapter. I’m wondering what happens next…

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts here Rene.

    Best wishes :)

  3. Anne Maybus says:

    I still protect my children and they are teenagers. There is still a lot of time ahead for them to have to face the demands of the world. Let them enjoy this stage, too. It is hard to be at the stage where ‘hands off’ mothering is beginning. Finding the balance between allowing them to make their own choices and making some for them is difficult. They amaze me every day, thougn, with their young wisdom.

  4. Stephanie Crawford says:

    Hello Anne,

    Thank you for your comments here.

    Yes it is very difficult to be at the ‘hands off’ mothering stage. The challenge certainly is in finding the right balance.

    Seeing them make mistakes is difficult but it is part of their growth and learning.

    Best wishes :)