Dreaming of Sugar Plum Fairies
December 21, 2011 by Káren Wallace
Filed under current, Serenity Space
Last night as I prepared dinner for my horde, I pulled out my special Christmas recipes and started prepping for the mini Christmas cakes I first made before my eldest son was even a glimmer in his daddy’s eye.
The recipe, on a page torn from a magazine, was dated 1988.
As I measured fruit and walnuts and almonds and went hunting for brandy (and ended up with port – that should be ok, right?) I felt a sense of melancholy wash over me. Right in that moment, I realised I was trying to don the mantle my mother used to wear.
Mum made Christmas seem effortless. And was always the one reminding me to ‘just do what you can’.
December is a month unique on our calendar. The countdown feels so immediate – we’re hurtling full speed for the end of another year, and there’s that pressure to not have the year be a waste. To get those final things done that you’ve been planning to do all year.
And then on top of all that pressure, there’s the holiday season. Christmas for us has always been big. And in retrospect, it’s been mostly my doing that made it so. I wanted it to be magical, a time that matched my dreams of sugar plum fairies and miracles of gifts and family and love.
The pressure piles up on top of pressure, and the guilt sets in. (And exhaustion creeps through the side door, unannounced and unwelcome in the extreme).
Two realisations I am pondering this week as we hurtle towards the year’s finish line (I’d love you to join me):
Love is what matters
I can make it easy, or I can make it stressful: the choice is always mine.
I’ve got both these stuck on my fridge right now. I need the reminders.
Wishing you dreams of sugar plum fairies and gorgeously wrapped piles of abundant gifts, and a reality of ease, calm and so much love.
Káren xxx
Image: Shandi-lee
About our Serenity Space Writer
Káren Wallace is passionate about leading women to rediscover the fire in their belly for their work and their life when they are exhausted and the sparks are no longer flying. She is known for her ability to break the complex down into easily digestible morsels, easily savoured but with long-lasting and often life-changing results.
When she’s not coaching, writing, or editing The Calm Space, you may find Káren planning her first Christmas in her new dream home surrounded by family and friends.
You can find more about Káren and her coaching programs at KarenWallace.com, and do come say g’day on Twitter :-)
I can’t believe you have written this Karen, I have been feeling this way all of December myself! It’s great to know I’m not the only one asking “Isn’t it family who matter the most? Shouldn’t love come first?”
This year, I have scaled down Christmas slightly, emphasising family relationships, being there for each other, and caring.
A wonderful, fantastic, magical Christmas to you, my dear friend, filled with a million dancing Sugar Plum Fairies!
This year Christmas feels different. Like you, Karen and Joanne, I have had similar feelings. It’s as though I’ve grown up at last and this Christmas will be my own person, not try to be someone I’ve always tried to be. We’ve gone back to basics this year. It will be good.
Merry Christmas to you.